Dressing Gown

Close the door against the fading distant engine
Glance around the empty space where you just stood
Your aftershave still lingers on the edges of my lips
Try to fight against my tears, but it’s no good.
I’d never ask you to re-think what makes you happy
I’d never beg you live your life another way
But the happiness I feel with you, depends on you and me
And it fades to black each time you go away.

Look at me, sitting here on the floor
Eyes fixed on nothing, like they have been before
Twist the ring you gave me,
Recall last night
Hope you’re safe, you’re OK
Hope when you return, we’ll be alright.

And I’ll wrap my body up inside your dressing gown.
Your initials resting somewhere near my heart
Pull your belt as tightly as I can, around my failing strength
Tie it in a knot, so I can’t fall part

Watch the clock hand as it slows and then reverses
Existing day to day with spare time on my side
When you ask me if I’m OK, I just laugh and say I’m fine
Then you’re quiet, and we both know that I lied.
Carry on with all the things we do together
Work life balance an equation always wrong
Wander room to room, still looking, hoping you just might be there
Full of memory, full of us, yet it feels wrong.

Look at me, sitting here on our bed
Ears fixed on nothing, but the voice in my head
Twist the ring you gave me,
Regret that fight.
Hope you’re safe, you’re OK
Hope when you return, we’ll be alright.

And I’ll wrap my body up inside your dressing gown.
Your initials resting somewhere near my heart
Pull your belt as tightly as I can, around my failing strength
Tie it in a knot, so I can’t fall part.

Hear you laughing at the things you did with others.
Hear you whisper that you’re finding it quite tough
Hope you know how I hard it is for me to hear you carry on
Hope you’ll always think that I will be enough.
Paint my face, dress up well, keep my nails long
Live each day as if I lived all on my own
Feigning strength just a diversion from the gaping hole inside
Counting down the days until you’re coming home.

Look at me sitting here at your desk
Heart fixed on nothing, but the void that you’ve left
Twist the ring you gave me
Fight or Flight.
Hope you’re safe, you’re OK
Hope when you return, we’ll be alright.

And I’ll wrap my body up inside your dressing gown.
Your initials resting somewhere near my heart
Pull your belt as tightly as I can, around my failing strength
Tie it in a knot, so I can’t fall part.

Stand and watch you as you make your way towards me
Teenage butterflies still prove that you’re the one
See you smile that smile, and crumble as your eyes begin to shine
Seems you missed me just as much when you were gone
Touch my cheek with gentle fingers, eyes are brimming
Shake your head, drop your bag upon the floor
Wrap your arms around the body that’s been lonely for so long
Tell me there’s no need for sadness any more.

Look at us, sitting here, side by side
Hands locked together, with nothing to hide.
You twist the ring you gave me
Recall that day
Glad you’re back, you’re unchanged.
Glad you’re saying we’ll always be OK.

And I’ll wrap my body up inside your waiting arms
Place my grateful face somewhere beside your heart
And your dressing gown will hang back on the peg that you put up
And gather hints of you ’till next we’re pulled apart.